Runaway! Excerpt from the book "And I will love you until I die"

Rita and Tomasz, young people full of joy, taking full advantage of life, sometimes slightly obstructing the boundaries of the law, do not expect what fate has prepared for them. They have very precise plans themselves, a beautiful wedding dress is waiting ...

As a result of a tragic combination of circumstances, their lives change dramatically; There will be no wedding, there will be no time together, there will be no more wind in Rita's hair, the joyful, crazy girl will disappear. She will have to deal with herself, she won't even get help from Tom's mother. He will decide to leave.

In Masuria, she meets a man who, in love with her, proposes a life together. Maybe not what she had hoped for, but Rita can't afford to freak out. The jointly run guest house in Masuria is doing well, the children are growing up. Rita's world is subordinated to her duties and her husband, Rita herself also becomes a subordinate person. There is no more will to fight, no desire to adventure; her joy, apart from children, is horses. He spends his important moments riding horses around the area.

And this orderly, somehow put together life suddenly crumbles like a house of cards, and Rita will once again have to face the perversity of fate. She will also have to face herself - and it is not known which of these struggles will turn out to be more difficult ...

The Jaguar Publishing House invites you to read the latest book by Anna Kasiuk, I will love you until my death. Meanwhile, we encourage you to read the premiere fragment of the first chapter of the book:

Rita jumped up on the bed. She had to scream because she gasped and clutched her crumpled nightgown into her fists. Sweat sprinkled her forehead. She looked around the darkened bedroom for reassurance that she had just experienced a sleepy mary. Each time she wanted to make sure the dream was not coming true. Slowly her breathing calmed down. Until that night, she believed that the nightmares had stopped haunting her. They had never been as expressive as the one who had just awakened her. She held her breath, listening to the silence. Her sons were sleeping behind the wall, next to her she should feel her husband's slightly bulky body. But he still wasn't there.

There was no sound behind the closed bedroom door. So she stretched out on the bed and consciously summoned a terrifying dream. For the first time, she had seen more than ever. Wedding, white dress, beautiful hairstyle, high heels. Next to her, he is dream, perfect and loving.

They had a wedding session scheduled that day. It is true that before the ceremony, but they managed to catch the only available date for the photographer, so they had no doubts. They were often guided by spontaneous decisions, which made their lives extremely exciting and colorful.

"It's not a good idea for a groom to see his future wife in a wedding dress," her mother warned her.

But they did not believe in superstitions. They were young, very young and convinced that life was open to them. The marriage was to breathe wind into their sails and snatch them out of the small, deprived town in which they lived.

It was supposed to be like that. However, it happened otherwise.

After the session, they went to a nearby bar. It was already late. The wedding dress and exquisite suit made the young people feel free and with impunity. Maybe that's why he reacted so violently to the guy's teasing? Rita couldn't really remember who had started. Suddenly she heard a bang and the two bodies pressed together in a steel embrace. Her mind was dimmed only by the image of broken glass and the fury of the men rolling on the floor. As dark blood stained her dress, her future husband's voice snapped her out of the embrace of panic:

- Runaway!

She did as he said. She was walking alone along the road, staring at the dotted line separating the two lanes. She was holding shoes in her hand, and her head was absolutely empty. They picked it up as the first lights of houses loomed around the bend. After that, she was asked a lot of questions. She was forbidden to leave the town, the neighbors avoided her eyes. But that wasn't what worried Rita. Her chosen one had a temper, although he really was not a bad person. However, it turned out differently.

When she found out that they would not see each other for many years, because the man from the bar had died as a result of his injuries, her world collapsed. The awareness of the life smoldering beneath her heart did not help. What did it mean when his father was to spend his time behind bars?

Rita squeezed her eyes shut tightly as tears ran down her cheeks. She wanted to forget. However, the recurring dreams were like a judgment reminding us of the mistakes of youth.

She went downstairs to drink some water. On the way, she checked the boys. The calm breathing of the sleeping children soothed her emotions a little. There was a light in the kitchen. Wrapped in a bathrobe, she stood in the doorway.

"You finished late today ..." she asked her husband, leaning over the plate.

She always told him that eating at this time would give him a heart attack. But Jan was one of those people who knew and did the best. Over time, Rita became convinced that she should not discuss with him what he was allowed to do and what he should not do for his own good. Vanity and overconfidence ruled out the existence of any dangers that could thwart John's plans.

- Mm, spring has come. People went out into the fields, and after work they want and have the right to drink. A little more and you'll have just as much work at the guesthouse. He looked at her meaningfully.

Jan hated disorder. That's why he was in charge of the finances in their home. And while Rita couldn't complain because she always got what she wanted from him, the overbearing attitude of a man who should love and respect her weighed heavily on her.

She wrapped her bathrobe more tightly and poured herself a glass of water. A pleasant chill ran down her throat, relieving her.

- I'll go to bed. She headed for the door, ready to end the uncomfortable conversation.

Jan, however, was in the mood to talk. Despite the late hour, he showed no signs of fatigue.

- You had a bad dream? She paused in the doorway and glanced at him over her shoulder. - I'll make you a drink. You haven't had them for a long time. Maybe you want to talk?

- Not. Thank you.

- But come on, Rita. Have a drink with me. I need company today.

Without waiting for a reply, he reached for the glasses and handed one to his wife. He passed her on the threshold and into the dining room.

Rita smelled alcohol from her husband. It was later than she thought. She misjudged the situation and encountered the tipsy Jan. It was going to be a rough night.

- I was looking at the reservation book today. It's a busy month ahead. And this is only May, in June we should start in full swing. Sit down, he encouraged her, patting the seat on the couch. Rita sat on the edge, keeping a safe distance from her husband. - Let the school year end. You will see, after the pandemic, everyone will go to Masuria. People will still be afraid to go abroad. Jan paused and focused on his wife.

- You will make it?

- Of course. It won't be that bad. Misha and Katia are coming this weekend. I'll have help.

- These two dykes.

Jan clucked and shook his head. He did not hide his homophobic convictions, although in the company of girls who had come to work for many years, he never revealed his prejudices.

- Jan, they are really hardworking girls. Besides, they treat our guesthouse as their home.

"I don't know if they aren't a bad example for children," he continued, without even looking at his wife.

Rita knew perfectly well in which direction this conversation was going. During nine years of living together, she learned to distinguish the moods of a capricious husband.

- But why?

- These are sick women.

- They're not sick. If you stopped thinking about what they have in common, you would see their advantages. I can assure you that I am grateful to the girls for their help.

They have a wonderful effect on boys. They are patient and do a lot of the housework for me, while I can look after the children and the stable.

Only hearing her warm, slightly pleading tone did Jan feel satisfied. Of course, he did not intend to get rid of two Ukrainian lesbians, but he preferred to keep his wife in suspense. It was then that he felt he had an advantage over her.

- Okay, I don't say anything anymore. But I'll be watching them, 'he added, pointing at Rita with his finger. She smiled gratefully, although deep down she expected such an ending. - What did you dream about? Can you tell me?

- There is nothing to talk about. It was an exciting day. I was at school with boys and Juka became foal, so a lot was going on. I am a bit tired - she emphasized, seeing the eyes of her well-drunk husband moving on her body. - And dreams come just then.

- He's not coming back. You can be sure of it. You got me now. I am responsible for you and I will protect you.

- I know, Janek.

- Come to me. He held out his hand to her, his face lit up into a smile. - I've had a long day too, and I've been thinking of you.

She felt sick with ineptly expressed deceptions. Jan could never be tender. His demeanor was always cold and distant. However, at times when he was counting on something more, he tried to strain himself to be sensitive.

- Maybe it's time to go to bed then? She risked, hoping to avoid rapprochement.

- That's a very good thought. Come on, I'll lay down next to you.

He pulled her close to him, took his glass out of his hand, and set it on the floor beside his. He sat the woman on his lap and pulled her head against his. His wife was beautiful. Long dark hair fell over a white shirt, under which tiny pink nipples were showing through. Her physicality meant that she could not complain about the lack of male adoration. And although he felt a great desire to lay his wife on the bed and lick her body and caress him, he restrained himself from it, becoming convinced that flaunting tenderness was nothing more than showing weakness, and he was not sympathetic to this. That's how he was raised. With the tough hand of the father and according to the strict rules of the mother. There was no room for weakness in his home, which is why he had come so high in the community where they lived and achieved everything he once dreamed of. He was kissing his wife's soft lips now, and the world swirled under his eyelids. She smelled fresh and innocent, despite the fact that she had experienced many things.

Rita closed her eyes. In her mind, she saw a meadow dotted with summer flowers. Juka was running on it, and just behind her awkward steps were a foal. Over the years, she had learned to turn off her mind in the course of the act between her and her husband.

She felt bloated fingers slide over her skin. This time he was not harsh, but the knowledge that he was an extremely impulsive and duplicitous man deprived her of any pleasure in sex.

Her faster and faster breaths were to assure her husband of the intimacy pleasure, while Rita's head was filled with completely different images. She raised her arms and let her shirt slide off her. Propped up with her elbows on her husband's shoulders, she began to move more and more dynamically, simulating the approaching orgasm.

- Take your time so…. I just need a little more time. ”He gasped, then sucked on her breasts.

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